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Why Balance Is More About Boundaries Than Time

coaching wellbeing Oct 05, 2021

When I ask clients to define balance for them, they talk about quality time with loved ones, feeling calm, feeling happy, having fun, taking time out for themselves, and yet when they first start to look at their free time during a week to make any of this happen, it’s taken up by other things.

We’ve all been on some kind of time management training during our careers, we’ve been taught about colour blocking, block scheduling, chunking, the time of day to complete certain tasks based on energy and brain power, Pomodoro techniques and many other things. And I use some great tools to help me to be as productive as possible throughout my week.

But the reality is for most of us that no matter how many times we are taught to manage our time, we don’t make it happen. And that’s because we don’t talk about boundaries. We talk about minutes and hours. And we all have the same amount of those.

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Women In Business After Burnout

burnout coaching hr leadership wellbeing Oct 01, 2021

I’ve made no secret of the fact that after my Burnout I continued in my corporate career and that’s where I thought I’d stay, until, three months after my two operations in 48 hours, I heard myself say for the very first time that I wanted to start my own company.

Never had I ever imagined that this was a path I would take. Firstly, I had no real idea what I would do, secondly I knew nothing about starting a business, and thirdly, my dreams of the super large global role that I would be able to take on once my sons were finished school was the thing that had kept me in my role.

The drive though of starting my own consultancy became overwhelming, and within three months, I’d left my six-figure salary, created a business that was aligned to my values and started to really focus on the change that needed to be made in the world of work. And seven and a half years later, I’m still here and growing from strength to strength.

Recent...

10 Ways In Which Working Environments Are Causing Burnout

burnout leadership Sep 28, 2021

10 Ways In Which Working Environments Are Causing Burnout

More and more workplaces are offering a week off to prevent Burnout and many individuals assume that one week off will fix how they are feeling.

If it truly is Burnout that is being experienced, a week off will not solve this.

In 2019 when the World Health Organisation defined Burnout as an occupational phenomenon and it stated that:

“Burn-out is a syndrome conceptualized as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed. It is characterized by three dimensions:

feelings of energy depletion or exhaustion;
increased mental distance from one’s job, or feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one's job; and
reduced professional efficacy.

Burn-out refers specifically to phenomena in the occupational context and should not be applied to describe experiences in other areas of life.”

If you Google Burnout in the workplace...

10 Ways to Move from Burnout To Balance

burnout leadership wellbeing Sep 20, 2021

Until my burnout in 2013, if you had asked me about the important things in life, what I valued and what I prioritised, it wouldn’t have even occurred to me to put myself on that list. I had a long list of what I wanted to achieve, the goals, the promotions, the lifestyle, the income, the house, the type of mum and wife I wanted to be – for my sons and husband, not for me, and I was set on achieving it all.

I exercised a lot because it was a stress release and another thing to tick off the list, but I was never really present, just focusing on how much more I could do in the time and how much further I could go. Everything in my life was about doing, being and having better.

I’d been told that I couldn’t grow and develop my career whilst being a mum to twin sons, I was told I’d need more time to reach the top, I was told that my timelines and aspirations were unrealistic. I was told I should lower my expectations.

And...

Help!

wellbeing Sep 14, 2021

Asking for help can be hard for some of us and I’ve come to realise over the years that it’s because we don’t always know why we need the help or what kind of help it is that we need.

I was moved up a year at school, a bright and able student, I was often top of my classes. And yet the further I got through school, the harder I found Mathematics. I’d often overcomplicate things, overthink things and see numbers in a different way. If I asked for help from the teacher or my peers I’d end up feeling really stupid, I still couldn’t grasp what they were trying to tell me. I stopped asking for help and struggled in silence. And then I got a new teacher and it all just clicked. Not enough to make me enjoy it, but enough to help me understand it and enough to help me achieve a pass. I wasn’t stupid, I just needed a different perspective to help me see things differently so that I could understand it.

I didn’t know that...

Letting Go!

Uncategorized Sep 06, 2021

I like to see if I can find themes from the week when doing my live videos and this week the theme is all about letting go.

When we are able to let go of the things that are no longer serving us, no longer lifting us up, and no longer making us feel good, we create more space for more of the good stuff. Sometimes we cling onto things that are falling away for fear of what might come, or not come in its place.

Rather than a long and lengthy post, here's today's video - I hope you find it helpful.

Kelly

Alignment!

Uncategorized Sep 01, 2021

I speak and write a lot about leading from your core, and alignment plays a big part in this.

When I hit Burnout in 2013, I was not aligned with my values. I'd been working in a toxic environment that was causing me to be much less of the real me, and it was shaping me into something and someone that I didn't recognise. Determined to fix the issues in the workplace and to do what I knew I was capable of doing, I kept on pushing, kept on trying to fit, and I kept on fighting.

I had seven months going in and out of hospital, working from my hospital bed, refusing to be defeated, refusing to give in and refusing to rest. I had work to do and change to create and I was damn well going to make it work.

Fast forward to today, and I'm aligned to my core, to my values, and to my work in ways I would only have been able to imagine back in 2013. And yet it hasn't been easy to get here.

Burnout caused me to question everything. Who I was, what I wanted, what I...

Alignment

burnout coaching leadership Sep 01, 2021

I speak and write a lot about leading from your core, and alignment plays a big part in this.

Fast forward to today, and I'm aligned to my core, to my values, and to my work in ways I would only have been able to imagine back in 2013. And yet it hasn't been easy to get here.

Burnout caused me to question everything. Who I was, what I wanted, what I was good at, where I was heading....

Two Weeks To Go!

Uncategorized Aug 23, 2021

With just two weeks to go until the Be Your Own VIP community launches, what do you need to know?

What is the VIP Community? It's a membership community for Professional Women that focuses on whole wellbeing: mental, emotional, physical, financial and spiritual wellbeing, because you are a whole person.

Why am I starting it? Last year during the pandemic I took a closer look at my coaching clients and knew I needed to make some changes. I stepped away from the HR Community and HRDs that I'd been supporting for the last 8 years and focused on Professional Women. I've never been busier, and I know there is a limit to the number of women I can support on a one-to-one basis, so I needed another way, a different way to help women on a larger scale to drive more change and provide more support.

Why is it needed? Women face very different obstacles and challenges when it comes to being our best selves in the workplace. Self-doubt, protecting our boundaries,...

It's Not All Netflix and Chill - 7 Types of Rest

burnout Aug 17, 2021

This week I’m away with my partner and our dog on the East Coast, a break away and just what we needed to recharge our batteries. We’ve walked a lot, mostly in the rain – British Summertime in full swing – we’ve talked a lot, we’ve explored and yesterday we found a beautiful Chinese garden and walks through the trees and by the streams and waterfalls, I found my Zen.

In 2015 whilst still recovering from my burnout, everyone was telling me to rest. To stop and to rest, to do nothing. And I spent some time doing nothing, and resting, and getting sleep, and nothing changed – I still felt exhausted.

We’re told that sleep and resting is good for us and something that we should do to benefit our health, but what if time out and sleep aren’t working for you? Did you know that sleep and rest are not the same thing and that many of us confuse the two?

We go through life thinking we’ve rested because we...

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